CIA is Recruiting – “Right Here in River City” (Monterey) – No Reservations Needed

But, have you ever imagined yourself hired as James Bond ?

Have you thought about working for the CIA? Seriously.

They’re hiring, they pay great, want smart people (who don’t ask questions and don’t have any of that sticky moral baggage), and best of all – criminal laws don’t apply to employees.

Yes, you could get paid to “extraordinarily render” (kidnap) people, use “enhanced coercive interrogation techniques” on them, and if you show promise they might even let you “euthanise” them.

Middlebury College

They’re recruiting this week, right here in Monterey at Middlebury College’s Monterey Institute of International Studies and its easy – “No reservations are required.”

This is much better than James Bond stuff, because if you sign up — you could remotely pilot Reaper and Predator drones from a computer at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada, “collaterally damage” unarmed civilians halfway around the world (“C.I.A. Drones Kill Civilians in Pakistan, New York Times, March 2011″), and get back home for a Saturday morning golf tee time at Pebble Beach.

Or you could “body snatch” random people – and waterboard them in secret prisons in exotic places, thumb your nose at Geneva Conventions — and sneak in some sight-seeing after work.

Abu Ghraib Prisoner

Don’t let Dick Cheney, Richard Pearl and Don Rumsfeld hog all the War Crimes – you too can conduct targeted assassinations “bump offs,” and maybe get indicted by some beautiful European countries.

Aren’t you inspired by George W. Bush, Barack Obama and our hometown boy turned CIA Chief Leon Panetta with those military drones with rockets and bombs?

I know, CIA drones have only killed 2,043 Pakistanis since 2006. (and its too bad they were mostly civilians and that we aren’t at war with Pakistan), but you could help increase that total body count.

Uncle Darth Wants You

And they hand out free stuff at these recruiting sessions like a CIA logo pen, logo carry bag and . . . (but I’ll save that for another article.)

So put on your spiffiest suit, but leave your morals and sense of humor at home, and get on down to Middlebury’s MIIS.

Uncle Sam Wants You to Help Make this a Fear-Based World.

Update March 2013: Not wanting to be left out the NSA (super secret US government agency) put on an information forum for prospective employees at MIIS on March 9th, 2013 at Noon.

“C.I.A. Drones Kill Civilians in Pakistan,” New York Times, March 2011)

Study: CIA drones strikes have killed 168 children

Report: CIA Drones Killed Over 2,000, Mostly Civilians in Pakistan Since 2006 — Three Quarters of Deaths in Two Years Since President Obama Took Office

Wikipedia article on CIA Kidnapping (euphemistically called “Extraordinary Rendition”) and Torture.

How Drone Pilots Wage War – “War without the Sound”

Is Leon Panetta a Saint—or a War Criminal?, by Dave Henderson

Obama Authorizes International Assassination Campaign

CIA Recruiting Ad on Monterey County Herald website

Abu Grahib photos – WARNING !!! WARNING !!! these are the real photographs of prisoner abuse at Abu Grahib prison. They make some people physically sick.

Obama Authorizes International Assassination Campaign

Secret panel can put Americans on “kill list’

The CIA and NSA Want You to Be Their Friend on Facebook

The CIA’s impunity on ‘torture tapes.’ That the CIA could destroy its videotapes of 9/11 conspirator interrogations without penalty is a shocking abuse of democracy